Tag Archives: value

Learning to let things go.

One of the things I most admire about M is his ability to let things go, and slide off his back. For me, it is one of the most difficult. If something bothers me, I cannot.let.it.go. It affects my moon. It affects my actions. It seeps into everything I do or think.

And I am so over letting things nag and get to me as much as they do, especially when it is, more often than not, something small and easy to toss aside and get over quickly (one would think!).  Or it is something I have just misunderstood or misconstrued in my head and is not as big or bad or annoying as I have made it out to be. Or, it is opinion. Mine vs. someone else’s. My opinion isn’t always right and neither is the next person’s. That is why it is opinion, right?! (see where my mind goes haywire, here?!)

I’ve experienced some emotions of late that I don’t like in myself, as a result. I’ve felt some frustration that has led to anger, some jealousy that has led to bitterness. And these feelings are ugly. And they are *not* me at all. But at the core of these feelings is my incessant need to hold on to things and not let things go, and not see them for what they are, but for what I have made them out to be, due to overanalysis, assumption and well, overthinking.

There’s that word again. Overthinking.

It all ties together, really. Overthinking. And as I see M with the ability to really just not let the little things get to him, and even if they are bigger things, he still has a nack for accepting them, and moving on. I however, will hold on for dear life and beat that dead horse silly. (I honestly think part of it is the Italian in me…Italians tend to hold grudges and not let things go like whoa!!)

So as M and I enter into the latest season of our lives together, my vow is to learn to let things go more. Not let little things bug me. Not assume the worst (and instead, anticipate the best!) automatically. Not get angry as a first emotion, but think more rationally. It’s one of my ‘I’m not perfect’ downfalls…my ability to see negative first, and assume so much, when almost always, whatever is bothering me is almost completely born out of my assumption, or frustration, or snap judgement.

And honestly?

Life is too short to just jump to the worst first.

Why not have faith and trust and know that whatever is meant to happen in this life will, and to trust myself in being valued, being a good person at the core, and being worth it. 

Learning to ‘sit down.’

Today’s ‘Girlfriends in God’ passage was particularly powerful for me. I continually struggle with balancing do-it-all-let’s-go-go-go, with taking a step back and realizing that sometimes less is most definitely more.

In  my commitments. To family, friends, and last but not least, myself.

In my fitness. Sticking closer to the ‘work smarter, not harder’ mantra.

In my eating. Continuing on the log as a tool, not as a hard and fast rule. In ‘setting it and forgetting it’ (rather than letting it consume my thoughts)

In my faith. In strengthening my relationship with God. In faith in myself. In faith in my life path.

When you cram all of that together, all of those goals, all of those…things, it takes up a lot of space in my brain, in my habits, in my day.

When do I ‘sit down?’

When do I let the process happen.

Rather than poke and prod it to death?

THIS:

We all struggle with balance and the inevitable battle with stress that struggle creates. When we refuse to balance the sometimes overwhelming demands of work, home, family, friends, and personal growth, stress will be the natural result. What we really need is a holy balance only God can bring. The story of Mary and Martha, two very different women, offers valuable truths about balance that we can apply to our lives today.

A balanced life is focused on right things. <-hello epiphany!! 

AND THIS:

Choosing to sit at the feet of Jesus requires decisive planning, purposeful scheduling and a willful determination. Every day, God wants relationship building time with us, which means that time at His feet, in His presence must be our highest priority…It is amazing to me how I can squander away the best part of my day, leaving God with the leftover scraps of time and then have the audacity to complain that my life is void of power and purpose. Distractions come from every side. Some of those distractions are good and wonderful things, but they are all still wrong things if they keep us from stopping to spend time with God. We make daily choices about where we invest our time as we run errands, plan meals, deal with children, clean house, and do laundry – but fail to schedule the most important activity of all, spending time with God.

Investing my time. My time is an investment. Just as is all of our time. It is valuable and it deserve to be made a priority. Not squandered away. Not OVER-planned down to a point of stress and losing sight of that importance. (This Lindsay also makes some great points on prioritizing and simplifying – I am constantly learning from you, girl!!)

I’ve been letting my ‘smarter, not harder’ mantra get the best of me…because I’ve been reversing it. Harder, NOT smarter. For example, when I read Lindsay’s post ‘dear overexercising’ – wow, that hit home. While I think for the most part I strike a good balance with my workouts and my teaching, the lines are blurring a little. I put too much pressure on myself to cram it all in. And instead of smarter, it’s just harder. And it’s not productive.

The same goes with the other areas in my life I mentioned above. I need to prioritize. Not try to do it all because I know I can, or because I am *that* productive. Honoring the investment. Honoring the time. And instead making quality investments with my time. Back to balancing too little with too much and hitting the balance of ‘just right’ in all aspects of my life.

I’m learning to sit down. (Again) going back to basics. And I already feel more balanced and ‘free’ just thinking about it. Take a step back, look at your time ‘investments’ and when you think of them that way, they mean so much more, don’t they?