Tag Archives: struggle

More than just a graduation.

This weekend, M graduated. For the fourth (!) and final time. Two bachelor’s degrees, one master’s and now a doctorate later, and M is done, accomplishing something very few ever do, and I couldn’t have been prouder of him walking across that stage getting his degree.

It was the first time I’d truly seen such pride in his face. For once, basking in it, rather than brushing it off, or just going through the motions towards that finish line to get.it.done.

And while I wish I had known him throughout this entire process, seeing him through perhaps the toughest part of his degree, supporting him the best that I possibly could, and throwing him one hell of a party, makes me feel so blessed and fortunate to be a part of his life now, meeting him at such a pivotal time, for him, but also for me.

Because, you see, his graduation day also marked my one year barre n9ne 60 day challenge barre-o-versary. During a weekend of celebration, it was a weekend where I felt as though everything in my life had fallen into place exactly where I wanted, for the very first time. From my life, to my love, to my body.

And when I asked M if he were to make a speech, what he would say, he said ‘I would look around at my friends, my family, and you, and say that three years ago when I started on this journey, I never imagined the people around this table would be around this table today, but I couldn’t be happier.’ 

I couldn’t agree more. 

For him, through a marriage ending in divorce mid-way through his degree, to finding each other, at the exact right time in our lives, and for me, walking into barre n9ne a year ago, never expecting to experience a complete and utter transformation from mind, body, and soul, just as I feel the last three years of my life, in parallel to M’s has been. Full of complete change, struggle, sadness and pain, to strength, confidence, happiness and love.

This weekend, it was more than a graduation. It was the culmination of the last three years of our lives, so gently meeting at the same intersection, together. As it were meant to be. 

And if this picture doesn’t capture the essence of the weekend, and this culmination, I don’t know what does. As a friend on Facebook noted,: ‘you’ll look so content and happy and totally blissed out.” And she was right. ❤

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I don’t normally cross-post to M’s blog, but he wrote a post that made me speechless. It really speaks to his journey from here until now, and if you have the time, please give it a read. Congratulations, love, you are amazing.

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As for the 60 day challenge barre-o-versary, there is more to come, including a before and after picture. But this post just felt like the essence of what I was feeling and thus, the before and after can wait 😉

Of rulers, challenges, blessings and transformations.

Let’s start with the goods…where else, right?

My final totals for the barre n9ne 60-day challenge?

12.5 inches lost!!!

Total between my sister and me? 23.5 inches lost!!!

Nothing short of In-CREDIBLE.

Tonight’s measure-in (and weigh-in, which neither of us looked at…it’s just a number and I’d rather keep it that way for now, thankyouverymuch. More on that later.) was exhilerating…it felt like a long time coming, yet, at the same time, like we just started yesterday.

But the biggest difference for me now?

I actually like my body <–wow, did I just say that?

Me. The one who confessed to feeling like a fraud, for mentally tearing myself apart, for struggling continuously with body image and comparing myself (ok, this still happens, but a LOT less) to others and myself.

Tonight, in what I equate to a half marathon-esque TRIPLE Jess and I took (because why not? go big or go home, right??), where the physical toll was really wearing on me and I didn’t think I could do another leg lift, thigh dance or plie, my body just went. It kept going. Mind over matter. Suddenly, when I was feeling near the end of my physical capacity, it popped into my brain. This is what will get me through that half marathon…the mental drive, focus and determination to get.it.done.

I feel as though I have come full circle with this challenge. Yet, at the same time, it’s not over. Not by a long shot.

This challenge will continue for us. We are going to keep going, to push further and accomplish more. Not because we aren’t satisfied with our results, but because this challenge is for life, in a way. This is my way of life. The eating, the barre n9ne workouts, the running.I have learned so much in the last 60 days, I can’t even put it into words right now. I will. In several upcoming posts (and a guest post on Tanya’s blog), but I will close with this…

I feel blessed. I feel inspired. I feel a huge door of opportunity opening for us. You meet everyone for a reason. And I met Tanya at an incredibly crucial point in my life. The sky truly is the limit. I am absolutely glowing with happiness, pride, and excitement.

Thank you Tanya, for everything you have offered us, inspired us with and pushed us to achieve. To the next 30 days and beyond. Let’s DO this.

To Jess, thank you for being my companion in tackling an amazing challenge and opportunity for us. I wouldn’t have wanted to do it with anyone else. It has changed us in so many ways, and added a deeper level to our sisterhood. You are amazing, strong, and motivating. I am proud beyond belief.

I’ll end with one of my recent favorite quotes…couldn’t be more true.

Wow. We DID this.