Tag Archives: run-mesia

11 mental miles.

By now, you’ve probably figured out that I have been quietly tacking on to my ‘virtual sherpa’ miles in support of my sister’s marathon next month. (and while I still refuse to say exactly where I’m going – proverbially and literally (!) speaking, I’ll share my goal when I reach it, mmk?)

So, this morning ended up being our ‘virtual sherpa’ run even though Jess isn’t planning to run her next long run (20 miles (!)) until Saturday (part of the reason for our ‘early’ sherpa’ing? It’s our two year anniversary  – yayyyyy – on Saturday and running 11 miles that morning did not seem to be the most romantic way to start it off, hehe).

11 miles was the plan.

I mapped out our route last night and unlike my sister, who, mentally, finds it easier to tackle longer distances by doing the same route several times (so, a 7 mile loop twice for 14 miles, for example) while for me, that would bore me to tears and also tempt me into stopping early. For me, a long loop the extent of the run just does it for me.

So. Our run took us 11 miles and almost entirely of one continuous route. The only change was one loop to get us to 11. And honestly, that loop played mental mind games with me. As we looped around, my legs were just beat up. (even though I intentionally gave myself a day between runs to let them rest a bit). They felt like I was at mile 9 or 10, not mile 5 and 6. Even M’s legs were tired prematurely.

We kept going and around mile 7, walked some and had some water and fuel (ala Healthy Bites, thank you Lindsay!!). I was SO thirsty for some reason, but only drank a little, given I always side cramp if I am not careful with water consumption. This is where I started to freak out a little. I was just.so.tired. We came up to a spot where we go left, and complete 11 miles, or go right (and a huge ass mofo of a hill, I might add) and shorten our run and go home. If this says anything about this run – I was thisclose to taking the shorter, yet, mofo-hill way. SOclose. 

And then M gave me some tough love. He said ‘look. I’m tired too. I don’t know what’s happening to us today, but we got up this morning to run 11 miles. We are going to run 11 miles.’

Me, using my inside voice: ‘sheesh. I love you too babe.’

😉

So, we kept going. And it was just labor. Torture. I am pretty sure I could not have been more miserable in these final 4 miles than I was (and I might add, not ONE BUNNY the entire run. That should have been a sign this run was going to be miserable!). At the only other super steep mofo-like hill, I just had to walk it. I tried to run, my legs were practically moving backwards (it’s that steep, I swear). So I stopped. And I felt the lump in my throat rising. The panic setting in. And I shed a couple of tears, but tried to hide them. We didn’t speak. Just breathed, held hands. 

And we took off once again and somehow, some way, managed to make it all 11 miles. It felt like 20. Truly. They felt almost entirely like dismal, awful, just downright angry miles. (except for the beautiful sunrise we witnessed during the first 3 miles of our run, the only good miles we ran, I do believe!).

So we made it. 11 mental miles. 

And when I head out for that redemption run on Saturday (a shorter one, of course) with M, on our two year anniversary, I’m going to turn those mental miles into happy miles. Channel the last two years. The best years of my life. 

Run-imations: run-mesia

*The third in my mini-series on my ruminations run-imations on running: A snapshot into my brain, on the good, the mental, and even, the bad runs. What I learn, what inspires, what challenges*

It’s hot. It’s humid. It’s 75 degrees at 7 am and 87% humidity. The air is heavy.

Yet you told yourself you were gonna run after teaching barre n9ne.

Even though M isn’t feeling well so this will make it a solo run.

You venture out. First few steps are okay, surprisingly. You let up the tension in your neck and set out at a good pace, not too fast, not too slow, watch the breathing.

And then, about 10 mins in, all hell breaks loose.

Every step feels ridiculously hard. Breathing labored, heart racing, sweat already pouring down your face.

You question why the eff you are running. It’s way too humid.

You question WHY you run. It’s too hard. It’s not fun. It’s too hard.

You swear at every step. You curse the wind (too hot), you curse the sun (way too strong for 7 am!), you curse your breathing (akin to running sprints yet it’s a slow and steady pace, wtf).

You want to stop. You want to quit. You seriously question your sanity.

Why run? Why do you like it? You clearly hate it. So stop, stop running. Right now.

It’s too hard. It’s too hot. The sweat is pouring down your face, and to top it off, no bunnies in sight.

(you snort to yourself…it’s even too hot for the bunnies to be creepin’!)

And then? You’re at the turnaround point to your quick and dirty 3 miler and you push it out of your head (it’s ‘only’ 3 miles and you are struggling? Stop being a wuss).

And you feel better. You feel stronger. You feel past the point of sweatiness where it doesn’t even matter that you’re sweating, and gross, and breathing hard.

Because this is what running is all about. Drenched in sweat from head to toe. Every muscle in your body doing its job. Working.

You look around at summer in full bloom everywhere you look. You embrace the heat, the hot sun, the warm breeze.

(because come winter? You’ll be pissed at yourself that you were actually bitching about that when you have snot – TMI – frozen to your face!)

And sure, you don’t see any bunnies today, but you usually do. Their ears peeking out from the blades of grass, their velvety fur and white fluffy tails.

You stop. At the end of your 3 mile run and you smile. Even with the sweat dripping down your body, including your upper lip (so sexy – not), the back of your neck and all through your hair. And smile.

THAT’s what running is about. THAT is why I run.

The end game. The feeling at the end of your run when you got through the mental game, and the physical challenge that running puts you through like no other.

And you realize that it’s yet another case of run-mesia (= run amnesia), as you walk up the three flights of stairs, legs burning, but mind, body and soul lit up, happy, content and proud.

Run on my friends, even when it sucks. It’s still worth it. 

That is why I run.

You might see the sweat, but I see the run-mesia setting in 😉

~~

On a quick note? My weekly chase goal – one and only – is to run like the wind this week. Embrace it. Get four good, solid runs in (checking one off that list today!) and don’t go into it dreading it…because what’s the point of that? Self-fulfilling prophecy, no? I need to go into my runs with that end game in mind – harness the run-mesia. So, that, my friends, is my plan this week! Check out some other weekly chase goals on Melissa’s blog!