Tag Archives: overthinking

Wanna know what I love?

I love that two days later, I am STILL thinking about how great my run was on Sunday. So great, despite feeling the day-two DOMS in full effect (delayed onset muscle soreness). So great knowing that I have it in me, I can DO this. And I can enjoy running again. Finally.

I love that I think I hit my overthinking breaking point last week and have declared ‘no more!,’ I am so DONE with overthinking every single thing. It’s tiring, I annoy myself with it, it’s fruitless and it’s mentally exhausting. I already feel better. I am so past that stupid fitness evaluation. I am so done worrying about every little thing I don’t like in the mirror and focusing on the things that I do. I am retraining my brain NOT to go down negative paths (I tend to do this as I drift to sleep) and have mentally told myself to STOP every time I’ve done that in the last few days. I am determined to make this ‘stick’ and become a habit.

I love Twitter accountability. Lately, I’ve been tweeting about making sure I get in a quick ab workout during the day (my abs are somewhat weak and an area I tend to skip over, bad habit!) and responses from my super fab tweeps make sure I get ’em done (that and placing two of my favorite Cathe Friedrich DVDs right on my desk as a constant reminder to DO THEM!).

I love oatmeal. Seriously. Cannot get enough. Whether it be Quaker Oats cooked with milk, cinnamon and chopped up apple, or a banana, and some peanut butter (sooo melty!) or even some chocolate protein powder (chocolate oatmeal? YES!), I love it. Screams fall (which I am now starting to embrace, partially by force!) and comfort. And is so filling with notsomany calories.

I love that I’m feeling mentally free right now and it’s making me realize how trapped I was in my overthinking tailspin, especially lately. Writing this out is going to be my reminder to STOP the overthinking before it starts. It’s a must. 

And now I wanna know…what do you love lately?

(PS, I started a new ‘some of my favorites’ page on my blog. swing by and lemme know whatcha think. Any I am missing?!)

On glimmers of inspiration, perspective and quelling the overthinking.

Putting things into perspective

I’ll cut right to the chase. I have a lot on my mind today.

My overthinking brain is in overdrive. I am trying not to march into negative thinking territory again after quite an interesting ‘fitness evaluation’ freebie I got at the gym I signed up for next to my apartment and am vowing to take a day to ‘let it marinate’ before I delve into it more here (and in an attempt to quell said overthinking). With that preamble, I am hoping to harness some inspiration and perspective I’ve gotten out of a few fantastic reads of late.

For as much as I wax on about having – and keeping – perspective, I tend to falter here a lot more often than I’d care to admit. Especially lately. Maybe it’s fear. Maybe it’s my overthinking. Probably a bit of both. But sometimes, the extra kick in the ass is what I need to reel that perspective in and realize that if nothing else, I am able, I am happy, I am downright blessed.

So when I read Christine’s post after starting to get sad that I am not running this Sunday’s half marathon with my sister Jess (though I will be there cheering her on, and running parts of it with her, hopefully! AND meeting Christine, as I hear SHE is running it too! Yay!)), I realized a few things.  Just because I am not running a half marathon doesn’t mean I am not a runner. And for as many runs where I struggle, I have at least two that are really good. That’s huge for me. The dreadmill thing is conditioning me. And more so than that? I am able to run. I have a fully functioning body. I am healthy. I am not injured. I am fully capable of getting back to that half marathon…one day. So reading Christine’s very personal post about her accident and how far she’s come, and this particular statement: “Comeback stories are the best… they show that there are great opportunities in life’s setbacks.” I seriously couldn’t agree more. I have opportunity. This is my chance. I just need to focus on the good, work on the areas I need to, and move on.

Challenges are both my nemesis and my catalyst. But at the end of a challenge, I always conquer. So...game on, let’s do it. 

This brings me to the beautiful Melissa’s post over at Live, Love & Run, on acceptance. On accepting your body, your life, your loved ones, everything. It struck me particularly today given aforementioned fitness evaluation but also because I have struggled with this very concept for awhile as has Melissa (I swear, our brains are in unison on some of this stuff lately!), and seeing her gain a ‘moment of clarity’ with regard to herself and her body, well, it gave me the kick in the ass (again!) that I need to do the same. See myself as others see me. Pick out the good, not the bad, and work on the in-progress areas each day, because a little goes along way.  I’m going to ‘borrow’ her image here, because it’s absolutely the truth. This is the reminder I need today. And everyday, let’s face it.

And finally, two more posts ignited such inspiration, I just had to share them. First, Alicia at Poise in Parma (who I get to meet this Saturday! Yay!) posted on today being ‘National Evaluate your Life’ day (in part inspired by Tina’s post at Faith Fitness & Fun, which I wanted to stand up and give a standing ovation for, particularly this: “…this post is a plea from me to you. A plea to take a close look at your life. Really take the time to consider your goals. Pay attention to how you spend your time..A plea to live the life that matches your values.. ”

So, what are the values I want to align my life to? AM I aligning my values to my life? In some ways, I think I am, but in others, I think I have a lot of work to do. Here are a few of the values that are really important to me right now, and they really tie back to how I am feeling mentally and physically and some of the goals I am working on to move past the negativity, to ‘mentally’ grow into the healthy body I am carving out (instead of falling into ‘fat day’ moments constantly etc).

Simplicity. Last weekend is a perfect example of simplicity. I want to simplify my life (back to my manifesto!), focus on me, M, my family, my closest friends. And the rest? Well, it’s still important, but peeling back the layers, what is most important is that list. Nothing more. Nothing less. Same goes for my fitness routine. I want it to be simple. I want it to be focused. And most of all, I want it to be what works for me and what I want to do. Not because I think I ‘should’ do certain things over others. (more on that tomorrow…).

Integrity. This goes hand-in-hand with honesty, to me. And living with integrity and honesty (not brutal honesty, but honesty nonetheless) is important to me. Being transparent, open communication. No games. No lies. Integrity. Important indeed.

Confidence. This is a toughie (and maybe this isn’t so much of a ‘value’ but to me, it is). Some days I am, some days I’m not. I just want the confident days to far outweigh the lackluster ones. Is that so much to ask? I think confidence is freeing. Freeing from fear, freeing to grow and freedom that the sky is the limit. I am mentally blocking myself from things in life that I shouldn’t be. Lack of confidence is robbing me of things I don’t want it to and that I never want it to again.

It was actually incredibly hard to come up with a handful of values I want to align my life to, but in writing them out, I am already feeling more clarity on some things.

I challenge you to do the same…’evaluate your life,’ what are the values you want to align your life with? And what inspires you like no other? How do you dig yourself out of that mental tailspin?

~~

I struggle with it every day…but it never ceases to amaze me how writing it out and really dwelling on it for a bit actually frees my mind more than anything else. I hope this wasn’t *too* all over the place as I suspect it was…but try being in my brain for a day and you’ll see the maze going on in there 😉

Getting out of your head.

How do you tell someone to get out of their head, when it’s one of the things you struggle with most?

This is what I try to answer, as I try and help M learn to get out of his own head.

I realize more and more that he is a worrier. Like whoa. Like, he gives me a run for my money in the worrying and overthinking department.

I was pretty honest with him this weekend about how he bottles up his worry and frustrations and it ends up affecting his mood, whether he realizes it or not. I told him that he has got to find a way to get out of his head, or to at least get out what is bothering him so he can stop worrying. For me, that’s called venting. Or blogging. For others, it’s very different.I told him that he needs to decide what works for him, but it’s something that will ultimately free him from the worries that fester and become larger than life when they can sometimes just as easily be snuffed out by simply talking about it, or blogging about it, or seeking advice from someone he trusts.

I told him that this person doesn’t have to be me. Of course, I’d love it to be, but it doesn’t have to be. I don’t expect it to be (at least not right now). I just want him to find a way to wrangle through whatever fears, worries, frustrations and expectations that flit through his brain on an ongoing basis. I can almost literally see the thoughts whizzing through his eyes when he gets into a mode.

He needs to find a way to work through it.

I can’t do it for him.

(even if I want to try!)

I am trying to be patient, I am trying to coax him into opening up a little bit more when he does seem open to it (other times, he gets as vague as possible when I start asking what’s bothering him…and that’s when I know to back off. He of course always tells me it has nothing to do with me, which at least eases *my* overthinking!) and when we do talk about what’s on his mind, I actually am able to help, and I think it surprises him a little. He’s just not used to it. It happened just last night. When he mentioned he gets into a mode where he’s isn’t as passionate about work or school and just wants life not to be so hectic. And I just want him to know that everyone goes through those phases. It’s normal. It doesn’t mean he’s any less of a man or any less good at what he does.

When we do get into these conversations, I realize even more what high expectations he sets for himself. And it makes me love him even more for it (even if he is mentally beating himself up for not being even more than that).

I’m trying to help him get out of his head…without forcing, without telling him to blog it out (though I did suggest a private blog, separate from his work blog and he is considering that. I of course think he’d be great at it and it might be the outlet he needs), without constantly asking him what’s wrong, or what’s on his mind. It’s slowly starting to work…but the key word is: slowly. I just think he’d free himself of so much angst that he doesn’t need, so much unfounded worry and stress. Maybe he’ll see it as he does talk about it more, or blog about it more, or whatever he chooses. I know it worked last night. I know he felt better. This morning he told me again how much it helped.

Little rocks.

He’s getting there. We’re getting there. I’m learning too. (and maybe need to take my own advice more often too, huh?)

😉