On tragedy and resilience.

I wasn’t planning to post for the next little while, but I feel compelled to today. (and that’s when I want to write…when I feel compelled).

My best friend, who I’ve known since I was 4, a sister friend…lost her house yesterday. Complete loss in a fire.

And I haven’t been able to stop thinking about it. About her. About her family. About how of all people that I know, she *least* deserves this (not that anyone does…but there are those few in life that tend to get hard knock after hard knock and I just wish I could take this away for her).

But then I started to think more about it. Yes, it is tragic. And devastating. But no lives were lost. Just a home. Just things. 

And out of tragedy is sometimes (more often times) opportunity. And I believe this is an opportunity for her. To get that fresh start that she has needed for awhile and deserves.

And out of this tragedy, it is also an opportunity for me to once again drink up some perspective…that while it was ‘just’ a home and ‘just’ things, it is far easier to say that when you *have* those things, and not when you don’t. It’s an opportunity for me to help in any way that I can, financially and emotionally. And it’s an opportunity to band together and support her and help her realize just how strong and resilient she is (because she often does not give herself nearly the credit she deserves. She defines resilience, in my mind).

So today, in the wake of tragedy, comes opportunity and resilience. And a chance to once again look around, realize how blessed this life is (and how fleeting those blessings can sometimes be), and, as this quote so fittingly says:

Consider Today an Opportunity of a Lifetime. Start Fresh.

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34 thoughts on “On tragedy and resilience.

  1. Oh I just hate to hear that it was a total loss. I am so glad that no one was there and hurt at least. And it’s just “things” but some of those things are photos and precious momentos. That’s the tough part I think…well…it’s all going to be tough. I hope it works out for her.

  2. This is beautiful sis. You’re right — it’s just things, just material possessions. She is safe, her little guy is safe. Her mom and family are safe. But truly — this is a time for her to reassess, reevaluate and get that fresh start that she so so so deserves. And in the meantime, we’re here as her sister-friends to life her up, support her financially and emotionally and however else we can. Because that’s what sister friends do. xoxo

    1. Right, at the core of it, they are all healthy and safe, but to lose it all, that foundation you know, has to be one of the hardest things to face. She is so strong, and with our and her family’s support, she will move forward. This is a big opportunity for her, I just know it. And we will be there every step of the way, in true sister friend fashion.

  3. Beautiful post. Earlier this year, someone broke into our house and stole many of our possessions. A few months later, we moved out and gave away many of our other possessions. It’s been a hard, but great lesson to note become attached to material things.

    I’ve found that, surprisingly, I’m much happier without all the stuff. I can see the beauty in simple life and be even more grateful for what is important – quality time with people I love.

    I’m so glad your friend has you during this time.

    1. I remember when you told me about that break-in, that is right up there on the shattering of one’s foundation, isn’t it? I bet you are happier without the ‘stuff’ and a fresh start. That is what I hope for her too. XOXO

  4. 😦 I am so sad for her, this brings tears to my eyes. Your perspective is perfect though, and I know her well enough (I think) to say that I’m sure she sees that perspective through the tragedy as well.

    Please let me know if I can do anything.

    XOXOXO

  5. Ugh…that is so hard! I am sorry for your friend. I hope in time, things will get better for them. In the meantime, I hope she is able to find comfort and ease for the sadness and pain. And you are right..we don’t know why these things happen, but sometimes you have to look at new painful seasons as a chance to start fresh.

    1. It is hard, but she will find some comfort, and already has, in the support she has received so far. Fresh starts are a blessing, too.

  6. a few friends of ours lost their homes in the tx fires here last year. it was devastating but they could care less about the home, they were so thankful they were all together. Amen!

  7. You are such a great friend, Jobo. I have no doubt that spending time with you would help her remember just how blessed she is.

  8. This is beautiful Jo and breaks my heart. But I’m glad to hear that no one was hurt. You are right – they are just things and this does afford an opportunity. It’s often hard to see that but I appreciate your perpective and I’m sure that your friend does too. You are a great friend!

    1. Thank you so much! I think it does afford opportunity, as much as the actual fire itself is not an easy thing to go through and deal with, from scratch. I know she can do it though!

  9. I am still so sorry this happened to her, and I’m waiting to hear back from my sisters on what they’ve been able to gather up. You’re absolutely right this could be a great opportunity, and it’s so hard to see it as that when it’s still so fresh and so painful. They are just things…but they’re things you work hard for…and things you want to save…that’s when it gets tough, and luckily, she’s got her whole life ahead of her to make new memories and start fresh. So sorry, friend. Please let her know she’s in my prayers.

  10. In darkness is where even the smallest ray of light can shine bright. Thinking of your friend and praying that she finds comfort in this storm. It’s hard when we do not know the ‘master’ plan, but I pray that she can look back and see a new beginning and promise arose from a tragedy.

  11. Sad to hear your friend lost her home but I think in times of difficulty, things do work out in the end, with a little help from friends and family. I know from my own situation when my sister and my dad lost their home, they were able to start again and in a weird way, life is really better for them now.

  12. I’m so sorry for your friends loss. Thank God no one was hurt. I hope she finds some comfort in the new opportunities brought by tragedy.

  13. This still makes me so incredibly sad for your friend. But you’re right, it can really be a whole new opportunity for her to start fresh. It could very well be the beginning of something wonderful. Keep us posted on your friend as she starts this new journey.

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