Tested.

Saturday night at 7:30 pm, the lights went out due to a freak storm here in the Northeast, dumping as much as 3 feet of snow in some areas (we got 4-5 inches, max).

The power just got restored to my complex an hour ago.

More than 36 hours of no electricity…tests you.

The past two days have felt miserable at times and honestly, I made it more miserable by being so upset and angry about it than just making the most of it.

Instead of just accepting the situation for what it was, I let it seap into my mood in every possible way.

Instead of not worrying about what was out of my control, I worried more.

I wanted to step back, shake myself, and tell myself to shut up. It’s not *that* bad.

I was tested this weekend, yet it can always be worse. ALWAYS. (my sister also has no power…but also no water AND a sick baby, how on earth do I have a right to complain, when I at least had water and uh, no sick child at home).

Yet, despite not having power, we did make the most of it (M has the supreme knack of being able to shake me of a bad mood, no matter what).

…he pulled out a random card game last night, next to our fireplace – which, thankfully worked, as it is gas-powered – called Zombie Land, that we attempted to play until it was too complicated and we just gave up.

…he used stuff from the ‘survival backpack’ he made on a whim once that I tease him to no end for having, but good Lord, did that thing come in handy. Crank radio, wind up flashlight, batteries. Um yeah, that was an “I told you so” I deserved!

…he rubbed my feet and made sure I was warm. We cuddled. Played with the cats.

…he lit candles, turned the radio on, and we just lay there. And it was perfect.

…and last night, when we were curled up in bed and I realized that this very night three years ago, my ex-husband told me he wanted a divorce, I felt like the luckiest, most blessed person alive.

Three years later, to be with a man I was meant to be with, after going through so much to get from there to here? Suddenly, not having power didn’t seem to matter anymore. 

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34 thoughts on “Tested.

  1. No electricity can definitely be trying. It can start off kind of fun, novel, but gets old really quickly. Thank goodness you had the gas fireplace. Hope your sis’ electricity gets back on quick. That cannot be a good situation. I am glad you were able to make the most of it and to realize how lucky you are.

    1. Trying, definitely. And yea, it started as a novelty, but 36 hours later, was totally not! I am humbled by others’ situations, and my sisters’ in particular, and while I didn’t like my mood this weekend, there’s a learning experience in everything, right?

  2. Hell – I wanted to shake you too!! Nothing I said seemed to get you to chill out, not even juuuust a titch. It really threw you for a loop – that being out of control of your elements thing, way more than I’ve ever seen in you before. Made me wonder if the overthinker was coming back out in you (the worrying side of “ollie”), but then — I saw how M would tease you at times, while other times, he’d let you have your rant moment, and there was a great balance there. *Another* reminder that you two are just so right for eachother…he “gets” you and how to snap you out of your funks (most of the time, anyway!!), and also appreciates this fiesty side of you, even though I’m sure it drives him bonkers sometimes too. To me? That’s love. Loving all sides of the other person – even the frustrating, tested sides.

    And side note….incredible what a change in emotion you’re feeling right now vs. just a few years ago. Wow.

    1. I know, my mood was less than desired, and hindsight is 20/20 and all that, but sometimes, you just gotta feel it to get over it, too. And M is a lifesaver at making me feel better and not getting ruffled at anything at all. Amazing power he has not to! And I love how well he is able to get me out of my funks, just as I am (I hope!) for him. I am so glad we found each other and I vow never to take him for granted, ever. He’s a blessing.

    2. i love seeing you two interact. Such good sister love and accountability. I’m so sorry this happened to you! we were without power for 3 days last winter and its was actually snowing here. it was crazy! then it happened again with the fires and it as 110F! We get so used to our comfort that when its taken away, we don’t know how to live. A lesson learned indeed.
      xoxo

      1. sisterly accountability aka bitchslap into reality (sometimes!) 😉 Very true! Having no power is so tough, and all the comforts you are used to are gone. It sounds so terrible to even complain about it, that I realize, but sometimes you gotta feel what you feel and then get over it. XO!

  3. And, while we’re all put out without power, we should remember what a friend wrote on my FB:

    “I know the risks involved when rushing a job. Given the choice between no electricity and a dead or badly injured utility worker… then to hell with having power. Be efficient, yes… rush and hurt yourself… no. We can live without power for a while. Inconvenient?… maybe……. but it’s better than losing a line worker. These guys are just like us…. they want to do a good job… they want to help us get back to being warm… but they do get tired…………. I think we need to give these crews a break… and huge “thank you” as we muster up as much patience and understanding as we can.”

    And a comment to that:

    “they are also spending countless hours away from their families who mostly like are also without power…well said, my friend ♥ More grattitude and less attitude in the wolrd would be a good thing…”

    Stick to the good. 😉

  4. Haha sis you made it through but it is trying. Really makes you realize how much we rely on power. I bet it wouldn’t have bugged you as much if your home didn’t equal your work place too. xoxoxoxo

  5. Thank you for the smile your post offered to me. It sounds like you were able to experience the ultimate version of “unplugged”. As rough as it is, I think we all should purposely experience it now and then. It is a perfect opportunity to wind down. As you had to wind up your radio, I am glad you came to embrace this time of winding down.

  6. Ok….no idea what happened there…what I was trying to say was: I’m glad we didn’t lose power during our snow last week…7+ inches!…it would have gotten to me, too. I don’t know why it’s such a buzzkill, but it is. Hope your power stays on!!!

  7. There is really no point whatsoever on wasting your time worrying about something that one cannot control. All it does is waste time. It’s like worrying about stepping in dog shit in a dog park. If it happens, it happens. I figured you would have been thrilled without power since you and your hunka-hunka burnin love could camp out and do well, things that people who lose power do to stay warm

    1. Believe me – this is one of my biggest downfalls…worrying about what I can’t control (and why it’s in my manifesto!), and that is what frustrated me the most. That I was LETTING myself get into such a tizzy needlessly. So, I guess I am still learning, lots to learn. And yes, my hunka-hunka burning love kept me occupied indeed, but it still didn’t bring the power back on like I was hoping 😉

  8. Isn’t amazing how looking back at certain difficult events can make the current situation not so bad? I’m very happy to hear that you got your power back. This weekend’s weather was crazy!

    We use to lose power a lot growing up – gotta love rural Vermont. I use to pretend like I was Laura Ingalls Wilder from little house on the prairie 😉 Not sure if this would work as an adult…but it just gave me a chuckle to think back on it.

    1. Hehe! Laura Ingals Wilder! I love it! So funny/true! The power DID come back but now it’s out again – fail. This weekend was a huge lesson for me. I’m not as good as I thought about not letting annoying things bother me so. It’s just not worth it! Ya know?

  9. wow 36 hours seems like a lifetime without electricity! good thing for that survival pack! I also made fun of eric for making one (dude, we have one in each of our cars, and we also have enough water to last three days, and we have that freeze dried food,…BUT we don’t have batteries for a flashlight…on my list to get stat!)

    1. I love it! Glad we aren’t the only ones with a survival pack 😉 And you are smart to have them in your cars too! What a good idea! 😉

    1. I definitely realized how much I do take stuff like that for granted. Rude awakening/wake up call. Feel bad for how grumpy I was, hope this is a lasting lesson for me!

  10. Ugh … In 2010 we had 2 feet of snow in February and lost power for 2 days. It was so cold (thank goodness the kids were at their father’s) … we were snowed in to the neighborhood so we couldn’t leave. It was just the dogs and DH and I! We had 6 small fire logs. We played Life in front of the fire one night and listed to a radio that ran on batteries … DH had lots of stories on his iPod of stories told in the 30-40s … it was fun 🙂

    1. That is a fun story! LIFE! I LOVED that game! I wished we had some cards, beyond that random Zombie game we tried to play unsuccessfully 😉

  11. That actually sounds like a lovely evening! I know what you mean, though. In this day and age, having no electricity can make you feel… crippled. But being with someone you love (man & cats!) makes it much better. Yay for survival backpack! I should make one of those. One of these days…

    1. I know, I was allowing the crippled feeling to overtake me, rather than enjoying the time with M and my kitties and just enjoying the silence. I guess after a few days, the novelty wears off too!

  12. It is so funny what makes people set off. Especially us women. I moved in the snowstorm Saturday and it all went pretty smooth and I kept my cool (even when MT and the boys chipped some of the hallway paint as they knocked large objects against it) but then the next day when MT and a friend of ours and I were painting the bedroom for hours and crap was just all over the place I became a basket case. Overwhelmed and tired. I think sometimes things like the power outage just take away your sense of control. You have no control. It disrupts your plans. It makes you have to adjust. And that can be jarring. Sounds like it turned out okay though. Cheers, T.

    1. So true – weird things set me off too, but they wouldn’t ruffle M in the slightest. I am glad your move was pretty smooth despite the craptastic weather!! It did turn out fine, was just a good learning experience for me!

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