Ups and downs.

From yesterday’s post, I realized three things:

  1. I am going to have ups and downs. And that’s okay.
  2. I am going to have days where I struggle to combat negativity. The trick is stopping them before they start (sound simple, but truly, thank you for those that suggested that, even as Alicia mentioned, verbally saying STOP when I start to go down that path).
  3. I am a work in progress…but so is everyone else.


Oh, and by the way, I am convinced I have the best bloggy buddies on the planet. Not just support (as always) but tangible advice and suggestions. For that, thank you.

I also realize that my ups and downs are usually relatively close together. I had such a great day when I wrote this post, and then two days later, this post. What gives? I’m actually really not sure, but all I can say is, after writing that post, I actually already started to feel better, and then as your comments came in, I started feeling even more assured that maybe my negativity isn’t so abnormal, that we all do it to some extent. The key is not to let it become so self-inflicting that it harms you. That you nip it before it gets to that point. It’s not a great habit, but it’s certainly fixable, and certainly something I can overcome. I’ve overcome a lot in the last few years, and I surely will overcome this hurdle as well.

Ups and downs.

Feeling back on the up and ready to take on the weekend. Easing into it after a long and tiring week, looking forward to spending it with friends, family, and M. Cheers friends, hope you all have a restful and fun weekend.


22 thoughts on “Ups and downs.

  1. You can’t understand the highs without the benefit of witnessing the lows.

    Ps you’re right you do have the best bloggy friends (and very lucky you should feel!!!)

  2. As you said – one of the things to remember is that we ALL feel like this sometimes.

    It may be different for everyone. I mean, coming into graduate school, a faculty told me that EVERYONE feels like, most of the time? They don’t know WTF they’re doing and they’re just praying no one notices. And, yes, MOST of the time. And, yes, EVERYONE – including those that pretend like they never feel that way, and including those that have been doing this

    I have to say – thank goodness someone told me that right off the bat.

    In addition, I think we all have downer days. Period. I think we can feel them as loneliness, as sadness, as inadequacy. The point is to accept them for what they are, to do what helps you unload and unpack those feelings (blogging, talking to friends and family, writing in a journal, going for a run) – but ALSO one thing we don’t often think about is that ALL feelings are part of life. That, maybe, we are meant to experience those downer days, however we feel them, because they are life. If nothing else, they help us re-evaluate, as you did, AND appreciate all the other days even more (as some other commenters have said). Further, maybe an important thing to try is allowing yourself to experience a bad day, without letting the truly self-negating language in. Does that make sense? SO not only is it totally normal to feel those shit days, you actually should allow yourself to feel them, to experience them – but learn to remove the self-damaging words (because while bummer days are normal, the negative thoughts about yourself don’t need to be a part of them, e.g. a bad day is just a bad day, it’s not your fault).

    PS I would also say that one way to feel better about yourself is to determine areas to work on, and go out asking for advice or looking for ways to educated yourself. Improve the problem areas, instead of worrying over them and allowing them to create self-damaging words. That might be difficult to do while you feel like shit, so maybe write down explicitly what you want to work on, and then do so when you feel confident and happy – not when it’s hard to find your confidence.

    1. Thank you so much Nikki or putting this all into words so much better than I ever could. Bad days happen, feel them. Yep! Write a work-on list…when having a good day…yep! Absolutely agree. Thank you girl!

  3. We are all works in progress. And here’s the thing…we need the downs to appreciate the ups. We have to have something to measure the good against.

    Life is good. You are doing great. Hugs!

  4. again, you come through with the perspective. you’re so right about balance, and also about appreciating ups. that’s my biggest challenge in this life. the man always says, “don’t worry so much. just be still and enjoy the now.”

    and someday, between all of y’all saying it, i may actually listen. 🙂

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