“And in the end, it’s not the years in your life that count. It’s the life in your years. “

I had a different post in mind planned today, but then caught wind of CBG’s mom’s passing and it’s been weighing on my heart all day. So, similar to T, I wanted to post a tribute for him and his mom and Sunshine, too, as I know this is all extremely difficult on all of them, as one of those life-defining moments that affects you deeply.

Life is damn short. Cancer, as T notes, is a bitch (on wheels). Our family and our loved ones won’t always be around on this earth. It’s days like this that smack me in the face with that reality (akin to this post) that I am extremely lucky to have the family that I do.

Sure, my relationship with my Dad is non-traditional. We don’t see eye to eye. There’s a history I cannot forget. But I can accept it for what it is, and try to forge a ‘working’ relationship with him because I’d regret it if I didn’t.

My relationship with my mom is one of friendship and love. She’s been my support system (along with my sisters) for my entire life. She’s my sounding board and my biggest cheerleader. Sure, we don’t talk every day as some families do (M calls his parents religiously every day. As does my brother in law) but when we do, we make it count. We text. We email. We call. Our relationship now as adults is special and something I wouldn’t change for the world.

My sisters? They’re my best friends. I never want to take that for granted because we’ve worked so hard to get to where we are now. I recognize that. I appreciate them and love them.

It’s days like today that make me want to reach out and hug each and every one of them (and hug M a little tighter, too, for he’s made such an impact on my life in the 5 short months I’ve known him). To pray for good health, happiness, and prosperity. It’s days like today that I sit back and want to take away the pain for those – like CBG – are experiencing and wipe the slate clean.

But since I can’t do that, I can look around me and appreciate the love I have in my life and the family ties that define me.

I thought this quote was suitable for today, because even though CBG’s mom’s life was cut far too short, the life in her years count for far more than physical age. And she will be remembered and loved forever. My prayers and thoughts go out to your family, to Sunshine, too, and I wish you all the strength in the world.

And in the end, it’s not the years in your life that count.  It’s the life in your years.


30 thoughts on ““And in the end, it’s not the years in your life that count. It’s the life in your years. “

  1. Oh, I’m so sad for CBG and his loved ones today, I will be thinking of them. This was a very sweet post and I agree with all your sentiments about family. My sisters are my best friends and my mother and I are very close, and try as much as I can with my Dad because as you said, I would regret it if I didn’t. Thanks for the reminder about how important family is.

    1. It is so sad, isn’t it? Have had a hard time shaking it of. I just feel for his family. I am glad it gave you a good reminder too, and you are close to your sisters. Makes a huge difference, doesn’t it?

  2. Whew. This made me get a serious lump in my throat.

    I had a very strained relationship with my dad. Then he got really sick and somewhere along the way, we were able to see eye-to-eye and agree to disagree on so many things. Thankfully, I remember that most about his death.

    Thank you for the reminder.

    1. Awww….gave me a lump in my throat just writing it. I am glad you came to good terms (give or take) with your dad before his passing. That is the best end result, isn’t it?

  3. Life is a gift and is so precious, none of us knows how long we have here. Somethings just don’t make sense, like why people get cancer, it’s sad.

  4. I would like to sincerely thank you for this post, Jo. Today has been extremely difficult and it’s not likely to get any better over the next two days, but it’s people like you and Tonya that have gone out of your way to give me just a little smile…and that is extremely appreciated.

    Thank you.

    1. To take the time to read and respond to this so quickly is extremely admirable…it warmed my heart to know that it gave you a little smile. You are a great man and son…hang in there as best you can. ((virtual hugs))

  5. I was 14 when my dad died. I was right in the middle of that whole “I hate my dad” phase. It was brutal at the time, and even more difficult to work through as I became an adult and re-evaluated my dad with a fresh, adult perspective. So many things I wish I could take back.

    In any case, thank you for this post. I certainly appreciate the friendship and support. And it makes me hug my own loved ones just a little bit closer tonight, too.

    1. I agree, it does make you hold your family tighter and realize that sometimes you can’t change people and to accept them as best you can is the only way to go. My heart goes out to you as well, Sunshine as I know this is difficult for you too, being so close, and also trying to be a rock for CBG. You are doing it. ((hugs))

  6. My heart hurts for your blog friends who are going through such a painful time. I cannot begin to fathom it. Nor do I want to try. I could never do it justice. You’re right about one thing – hug your loved ones just a little bit tighter, life is scarily short, to be thankful for the loved ones that still surround us? It’s a gift. Truly. Love you sis.

  7. This was so sweet. It’s amazing how supportive the blog community can be. CBG and Sunshine are lucky to count you as a friend.

    1. It is…I’ve really been touched reading all of the support here, on T’s blog and on CBG’s and Sunshine’s blogs as well. Every little bit helps.

  8. LOVE that quote! It reminds me of the one about “the dash” – have you heard it? It’s a poem about looking at a tombstone and noting the dates someone was alive, but really what matters is what happened in the dash. SO TRUE!

  9. That is such a fantastic quote. I’ve unfortunately lost too many family members to cancer. The most recently my Aunt who was one month shy of her 60 birthday. She was diagnosed with lung cancer (never smoked a day in her life) and died within 8 weeks of the diagnosis. Her death really opened my eyes to how truly short life can be and was really what set things in motion for me last year. I will be keeping this quote with me for sure.

    1. Wow…lung cancer is one that really freaks me out for that very reason – SO many non-smokers get it. Tragic. So sad about your aunt. I’m sorry, but am glad you like the quote.

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